Which couples are best suited for EFT Therapy?

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  • Couples struggling with one another by finding themselves in the same circular fights again and again.
  • Partners who don’t know how to communicate their deeper feelings with one another and are stuck in anger or shut-down.
  • Partners who are so frustrated with their relationship and yet, not sure what to do next.
  • Recovery from affairs, when the third party is no longer in the picture.
  • Significant others desperate to connect with each other  but have no idea how to, which can lead to helplessness and failure because nothing they have tried has worked.
  • Partners who are interested in deepening an already strong relationship.
  • Couples considering married or a serious commitment but are plagued by difficulties, even though they know they love each other.
  • Blended families, where parents experience difficulty coming together on parenting issues.

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is designed for couples who are committed to trying to work things out, regardless of how much distress they are in.  Please be advised, while EFT is highly effective for helping many couples struggling with disconnection, the relationship between EFT therapist and couple is essential so please unsure a good fit.

Success in couples counseling requires a commitment because the sessions are weekly in order to prevent the couples from falling back into their automatic, negative cycles. For this reason, if you are someone who has a difficult time following through with what you start, please let me know and we can explore together what gets in your way and find ways to help you stay committed to your relationship journey.  If the sessions are spread out, progress may not only become slow, but may be halting.  A substantial amount of research has been done to learn what makes EFT therapy work, just showing up weekly for therapy can make a big difference.

If you are ready to prioritize your relationship and take steps toward improving it, EFT couples counseling may be just what you need to help you connected to your partner.

How Can I Forgive You? The Courage to Forgive the Freedom not to.

When partners are traumatized by infidelity and betrayal, ‘How Can I Forgive You’ helps the body and heart of the reader begin to explore options to healing. For example,  how not to be caught up the pain that in many cases keeps the person who has been betrayed, hurting more.  It is also helpful for the partner who had the affair, read or listen to, in order for them to better understand the pain their partner is experiencing.  Reading out loud to one another helps provide  healing and creates connection and understanding. Click Here to Order NOW!

EFT Work Book for Couples: The Two of Us

A workbook based on EFT methods to help build a sold foundation for connection.[/fusion_title][fusion_text]This hands on must read, resource  helps couples begin the process of building a foundation of new ways of connecting together.  While Hold Me Tight is an excellent primer for therapy, this workbook will help carry the couple throughout the therapeutic process to really integrate the experience of therapy and create more safety between sessions.  Reading and doing the exercises in the book together, between sessions, helps each partner better understand themselves, their partner and their relationship, and the deep connective work they have done in the session.  The reason I recommend this book so strongly is because I noticed that couples who integrate the workbook into their therapeutic process, build more safety and connection within their relationship and between sessions, progress through the therapeutic process more quickly. Oh and BTW, I have utilized the book within my own relationship and really enjoyed getting to know my husband and my patterns with him even more. Click here to order NOW!

Hold Me Tight by Dr. Susan Johnson

The ‘Demon Dialogues’ and ways to stop the cycle and pain. ‘Hold Me Tight’ by Dr. Susan Johnson is a must read for any couple embarking on the journey of reconnecting and rebuilding their primary relationship.  It is my first recommended reading for any couple beginning couples therapy for several reasons.  Number one, the book helps one understand the science and research behind EFT, because it is not some fly by night couples therapy approach, but has deep scientific roots.  Second, Dr. Johnson lays out the dances couples become caught in found in the section entitled ‘Demon Dialogues’ which enables couples to see that they are not alone in their dances and can start to identify when they become caught so they can stop these demon dances.  Third, the deeper core wounds or attachment injuries can and do occur as a result of the negative dances and she gives hope on how to help couples moving through the hurts.  Using this book alone to change your relationship, especially when you have been caught in pain and disconnection for some time, can help but it is not enough.  It will help to facilitate your process when combined with Emotionally Focused Therapy.
Hardcover Version

iBooks Version

Audio Version

MP3 Version

DVD Version

An Emotionally Focused Workbook for Couples: The Two of Us by Veronica Kallos-Lilly and Jennifer Fitzgerald

As an Emotionally Focused Therapist who works with couples in distress, I have been recommending this book as an adjunct to the couples work since it’s arrival. I do this in order to reinforce the processes that occur during our emotionally focused therapy sessions.  Couples who do utilize this book during our work together, consistently move more quickly through the process and feel more empowered between sessions.  Not long ago, one of my clients queried me asking ‘Have you and your husband used the workbook?’  Realizing we hadn’t, we began working together on it Sunday afternoons using the working book during late lunches. It deepened my, and our, process in our relationship and helps me identify where my couples are in the workbook.  The only recommendation or change I would make regarding this book is to call it something other than a ‘workbook’ such as ‘Bonding Resource’  because that is what it feels like.  ‘Workbook’ doesn’t sound connective, and this book is.